The Cadillac of Toasters...

Rae: John likes bread, John likes toast and John really likes an obscene amount of butter on his toast. I think toast may just be a vehicle to eat a lot of butter.

John: Now wait a minute..."obscene" amount of butter!? By whose standards? More on that later.

Rae: And I hate to even try and count how many toasters we have had. You buy a toaster and in a what I think is a short time it starts to not toast very well. Pretty soon you have to toast 1 and a half times and often burn that last piece of bread.

John: I am simply, unapologetically, a lover of PERFECT toast!...

Rae: The toaster display caught John's eye. I told him he could pick one out for his birthday. I never thought I would ever spend this much on a toaster. The sales woman convinced John that he was worth it. And, well, he is.

But what a toaster this is. It came from Williams Sonoma and is a Breville which is an Australian brand. It reminds me of the heavy silver toasters of my childhood. The kind where you replaced the cord rather than buy a new toaster.

John: The bread should be uniformly browned, NOT BURNED AT ALL. And not too light either.

Rae: The buttons should be on an iPod or something. They light up when you press them. Choices are TOAST - A BIT MORE - BAGEL - DEFROST - LIFT AND LOOK. And at the bottom there are running lights that show the progress of the toasting. This morning I made my first piece of toast and it was a perfectly toasted piece of bread. Sigh. Form AND Function.

John: If even the edges are burnt...throw it away! Scraping is NOT an option!

Rae: Even better yet. After the sales woman listened to my whole story about bad toasters not lasting and what was I to do with this one if it quit toasting bread well her answer was that I would bring it back and be given a new one. If they no longer carried this one we would be given one of comparable value. I am a cynic about appliances and return policies but for now I will just enjoy perfect toast and the enjoyment of making each piece.

John: Too light and the appropriate amount, mind you...and you might as well cover it with syrup and call it French! "Paint" with butter out to the edges but not all the way. Leave the edges crisp! Remove excess. Follow with breakfast serving of Lipitor.

Rae: And the toast glides up and down like a CD going into the CD player. I love well designed things.

John: This "tool", this evolution of toasting science, this evocateur of breakfast delight, is the first step to enlightenment! Can you feel the love? And now my honey is greatly appreciative of my taste in kitchen power tools.

My husband the model

We have been here a little over 2 months and John has been picked up by a talent agency in Madison and one in Milwaukee. He has sent info packets to 6 more in Milwaukee and Chicago. He had his second shoot yesterday. The first one a couple weeks ago he was a VP for a print shoot. Yesterday he was a husband out for his anniversary dinner. That one was a block and a half from the apartment even though the booking came through the Milwaukee agency. So he put on a suit packed a suitcase of other accessories, took another suit and walked down the street. He actually comes home happy from enjoying himself at work. How nice.

Oh no...

We are in Madison, John is doing some job hunting. Last night he had an appointment for the open call at the Rock Agency. This is a talent agency.

Conversation upon returning...

Me: How did it go?

John: You won’t believe it, you are going to laugh your heads off.

Me: What happened.

John: You know.

Me: NO!

John: YES.

Me covering my face with my hands: Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no.

Jane coming outside: What is going on out here?

Me: John is going to be a George Bush look-a-like.

John laughing: Yes!

And yes we have been laughing our heads off ever since.

We are to do another photo shoot asap and get more photos to the agency and then they will start booking John. Apparently look-a-likes are big. (Some farmer around here looks like Richard Gere.) But there is other work they can get him also.

And while it would be nice if we liberal Democrats were in a financial position to be more principled... we may have to cash in on Bush’s last 8 years in the only way we can.

And here I assumed he’d end up doing Viagra spots.